Something we have been discussing for awhile is birth control (BC). I'm tired of it and would like to be rid of it... unfortunately I have a sneaking suspicion I may be a tad more fertile than the average bear. The 14 kids in my grandma's family and 12 in my grandpa's kind of wave a big red flag. Needless to say we're kind of scared. We may want a big family, but once I think of 7 or more my brain starts to panic.
Some history:
At the immensely fertile young age of 14 I went on an implantable contraceptive called Norplant. I stayed on it for the full 5 years, during which time I experienced amenorrhea, unpredictability, and at one point a menses every other week. A little annoying right? But worth it to not get pregnant (seriously, if you only knew what our lives were like before...).
So 5 years is up, I'm 19, I decide to use the Nuvaring. Normal menses for a few years, nice. Until late June 2008. For some reason it was really irritating me while inserted, coupled with the over powering feelings of "It's time to have a baby", we decided it was time. We had just celebrated 9 years together, we felt ready... maybe not financially, but we were emotionally and as mentally as possible. I was lucky enough to have my fertility return immediately (if that doesn't scream "it's time!" I don't know what does), Mini Awesome was conceived between the 6th & 8th of July 2008, born April 03, 2009. We had decided we wanted a few year span between the kids, 2-3 works for us, so we decided on Implanon, knowing it would probably have the same effects as the Norplant. Yessir it did. What I wasn't counting on was the cramping that I was left with postpartum. Love how pregnancy screws up your body chemistry...
So here is where we are now, I've had my Implanon for a year now, and I"m done. I can maybe stick it out another 6 months if I have to, but the sooner it's out the better. As I mentioned before we are terrified. I have no idea where to even start, I know there's a book I need to get but I haven't yet. (Dang and it's just $3 more than I have right now.) On top of everything, I'm still breastfeeding so I don't know what that will do to my cycles.
Our biggest worry/fear is having an unexpected pregnancy. We waited until we were ready to have R and it turned out perfectly. We'd like to wait a bit longer for Desmond or Danika. So I really need to figure out how to prevent pregnancy naturally. I know it's possible, I just need someone to hold my hand :)
Anyone have any advice for me? (Aside from getting a book.) Thanks!
Condoms! I know some people think it ruins the flow, but once you're used to using them, it becomes part of the flow - and very worth it. I mean, if the fertility book is too expensive, imagine another baby!
ReplyDeleteI loathe condoms, lol. Literally used them a handful of times in 11 years.
ReplyDeleteI solved the book problem for now, I requested it from the library :D
...I should have shorted the electric bill $3 and I could've bought the book, lol.
Maybe my husband and I are just "asking" for it, but we've agreed that hormonal birth control is teh grandest ebil and will not be in my body every again. (The first and last time I went on hormonal birth control I completely lost my ability to ovulate due to PCOS, which caused a wonderful 7 years of TTC.) Those last few months of TTC really taught me to listen to my body and the very subtle cues it gives that if I wanted to get pregnant, I should find my hubby NOW.
ReplyDeleteI would definitely use condoms until you recognize the pattern in your cycle as it returns. Once you spot the pattern, you will see the time that you are most fertile. Remember, it can be as long as necessary from day one of your cycle (first day of period) until ovulation, but it is always exactly 14 days from ovulation to day one of your next cycle. For example, if you have a 30 day cycle, you would be ovulating on day 16.
Once you figure that out, you will know when you ovulate and can use alternative methods or additional methods on those most fertile of days. That will also be helpful for when you decide it is time for Baby D - you will know when the next chance for conception is.
If you have problems with regularity in your cycle, this method can be hit or miss, but that's what the condoms are for.
Also, have you checked both the county library and the LLL lending library? I bet one or both have it available. You can read the entire book, then make photocopies of the pages you really want to keep on hand. I did that with the baby signs book.
~Jahnava
I requested the book from the library, all the local branches are checked out. I haven't even been able to get to an LLL meeting lately. The Wednesday mornings clash with R's class and the evening ones clash with her bedtime, lol. Good idea on the copies!
ReplyDeleteIn the very short time between stopping Nuvaring and conceiving R I did learn to pay attention to my body, and at that time I had a 28 day cycle. I learned a lot on how to get pregnant, I just need to use the info the other way so I don't. Speaking of, I need to brush up on it tonight.
PS- You are *never* ready financially. There will always be a goal or plan ahead of you that is going to take up finances that you could spend on a child, so if you wait for finances to be right, it won't ever happen. As long as you are capable and prepared emotionally, then you are ready for a baby!
ReplyDeleteI agree. He always wanted to have money for kids... I finally convinced him that was not happening. So we conceived while unemployed, lmao. At least it gave him incentive to find a job and keep it, now look where at our lives! Finally looking up :)
ReplyDeleteBasically there are 3 primary fertility signs, 2 of which are the ones you use for charting.
ReplyDelete1. basal body temperature (waking temperature)
2. quality and presence of cervical fluid
3. cervix position
Immediately after ovulation, your body begins producing progesterone, which raises your basal body temperature for the remainder of the cycle until your period starts.
As you approach ovulation, your body produces more and more fertile quality cervical fluid to help the sperm stay alive.
Your cervix gets high and soft as you approach ovulation.
There are 4 basic rules for avoiding pregnancy.
1. First 5 days rule. The first 5 days of your cycle are safe(starting with the first day of your period) IF you can confirm ovulation the previous cycle with temps.
2. dry days rule. If you observe no cervical fluid all day on a pre-ovulatory day you are safe that evening.
3. temperature shift rule. After 3 days of a bbt that is at least .2 degrees higher than the previous 6 days, you are safe for the remainder of the cycle.
4. cervical fluid dry-up. After you have 4 days of cervical fluid dry-up, you are safe. Now if you are temping and temperatures do not confirm it, then don't trust it.
It seems like a lot of work, but really it isn't. The main frustration is sometimes with interpretation and if your body doesn't work how it's supposed to (ie. very long cycles). If your cycles went back to normal after quitting bc last time, that's probably a good sign for you.
You may not always ovulate on the same day of your cycle, but your luteal phase is usually a consistent length for you. "Normal" luteal phase lengths vary from 12-16 days (from woman to woman). They may be shorter when quitting hormonal contraceptives, post-partum, or when breastfeeding.
You can see some charts here! http://www.tcoyf.com/media/
Oh, and it's definitely a good idea to use condoms the whole time for several cycles to make sure you know what you're doing.
ReplyDeleteThanks, just what I was looking for :)
ReplyDeleteI have never done temping, so that is a whole new thing to me, I'm under the impression that it won't work as well while breastfeeding until/unless she nightweans (pwahahaha!). I could be wrong as I have not actually looked into it, but that is what I have gathered from reading people's posts.
I learned how to watch the CM, I know that the EWCM (Egg White Cervical Mucous for those not up on the lingo) is what I need to stay away from.
I need to read so much on this subject still. I guess it's good we plan on leaving the BC until early 2011. Even though I'm ready to remove it now, I'm not mentally prepared for this next step yet.
It's not the breastfeeding itself that may interfere (from a temping standpoint), but your ability/inability to temp at the same time every morning and after at least 3 hours of sleep. For some people these factors make a big difference and really interfere; for others you still see a clear pattern and it doesn't matter much at all. Lots of people just do the best they can (temping whenever they find themselves woken up and trying to pick the most accurate one later).
ReplyDeleteOh, and since I saw you mention it on another post, it seems studies have shown that "pull out" is as nearly as effective as condoms as long as he "clears the pipes" and cleans up in between any multiple sessions and he actually does pull out. I haven't looked into it in detail myself though.